labellementeuse | (no subject)

In good news, I'm going in for my first rituximab treatment this thursday. This is a treatment that hopefully will make it possible for me to come off steroids permanently with a normal or safe count, so, you know, \o/! Should be about four cycles, they shouldn't take too long and shouldn't have any side effects.

In less good news, god almighty I hate my doctors up here. I'm thrilled that he's giving me rituximab, which I wouldn't have been able to get in CHCH. But jesus, I went along to see him, he said "Hi I have your notes from Ruth come in on Thursday morning and we'll give you the first dose." There wasn't even a question of whether or not I could make it (which I can't, actually, but fortunately my boss is wonderful and is finding me cover.) There was absolutely no discussion of what the treatment actually is, which I happen to know is a low-dose treatment administered by IV. I should theoretically be able to come off it in a few hours and have no or very few side effects, but heaven forfend that he talk about what those side effects might be or, you know, about the IV, or anything. He didn't take a blood test, he didn't suggest dropping my steroid dose - so I have no idea how they're supposed to tell if my count is going to be affected, and hey, I would quite like to come of the pred as soon as possible but forget actually talking to him about what level I can drop to - what I really want to do, and I think it woiuld be safe for me to do, is drop to fifteen but since I can't talk to him and have no idea what my count is like now, I can't (and, anyway, it's not smart for me to make an independent decision like that. Unfortunately, it looks like I'll be making a lot of these kind of decisions myself because he's not interested in helping me make them.)

Basically? He doesn't talk to me, has no interest whatsoever in making sure I understand anything and I don't like iot and I don't trust him and I miss my doctors in Christchurch. A lot.

Also I said I'd work tonight and I really, really don't want to, so WAH. WAH I SAY WAH.

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I suspect it might be... I know mum laughed and told me all doctors used to be like this when I complain but, you know, that might be true, but all doctors AREN'T like this now and dammit I miss my old doctors. :(

I think some people probably do like being told what to do, though. Sometimes that's even me... I'd just rather have all my options. (Which sometimes has meant doing some research myself, don't get me wrong.)