labellementeuse: a girl sits at a desk in front of a window, chewing a pencil (Default)
[personal profile] labellementeuse
I found this on my wanders and thought it was important enough to re-post, even with my relatively limited time. Not sure where it originated.

A lot has been said about how to prevent rape.

Women should learn self-defence. Women should lock themselves in their houses after dark. Women shouldn't have long hair and women shouldn't wear short skirts. Women shouldn't leave drinks unattended. Fuck, they shouldn't dare to get drunk at all.



instead of that bullshit, how about:

if a woman is drunk, don't rape her.
if a woman is walking alone at night, don't rape her.
if a women is drugged and unconscious, don't rape her.
if a woman is wearing a short skirt, don't rape her.
if a woman is jogging in a park at 5 am, don't rape her.
if a woman looks like your ex-girlfriend you're still hung up on, don't rape her.
if a woman is asleep in her bed, don't rape her.
if a woman is asleep in your bed, don't rape her.
if a woman is doing her laundry, don't rape her.
if a woman is in a coma, don't rape her.
if a woman changes her mind in the middle of or about a particular activity, don't rape her.
if a woman has repeatedly refused a certain activity, don't rape her.

if a woman is not yet a woman, but a child, don't rape her.
if your girlfriend or wife is not in the mood, don't rape her.
if your step-daughter is watching tv, don't rape her.
if you break into a house and find a woman there, don't rape her.
if your friend thinks it's okay to rape someone, tell him it's not, and that he's not your friend.

if your "friend" tells you he raped someone, report him to the police.
if your frat-brother or another guy at the party tells you there's an unconscious woman upstairs and it's your turn, don't rape her, call the police and tell the guy he's a rapist.

tell your sons, god-sons, nephews, grandsons, sons of friends it's not okay to rape someone.

don't tell your women friends how to be safe and avoid rape.
don't imply that she could have avoided it if she'd only done/not done x.
don't imply that it's in any way her fault.
don't let silence imply agreement when someone tells you he "got some" with the drunk girl.
don't perpetuate a culture that tells you that you have no control over or responsibility for your actions. You can, too, help yourself.

discussion welcome, as per usual. Repost if you wish.

Date: 2005-12-01 04:08 am (UTC)
ext_2569: text: "a straight account is difficult, so let me define seven wishes" image: man on steps. (Default)
From: [identity profile] labellementeuse.livejournal.com
if someone is alive, don't murder them
if you see something don't steal it
and it's the end to crime!


But the thing is? Society says that every day (with some exemptions for some specific forms of crime like tax dodging or whatever. And I do think that's a problem, too.) Society constantly stands up and says that the people who murder other people are responsible, that the people who steal something are responsible for it, and not the people who are stolen from- no-one tells the billionaire who's just had her $1mill necklace stolen that she shouldn't have had that necklace, or- before the crime- that she shouldn't have expensive things because they might get stolen; no-one tells the mother whose son was murdered that she should have had a more expensive alarm, or that he shouldn't have been home alone with the door unlocked- because it is accepted that it is not our responsiblity to prevent our own death by violence, although it is sensible to do so.

So I think you're slightly missing the point in that this isn't meant to be a guidance manual as to how to prevent rape; this is meant to bring attention to the ways we deal with rape. It's a crime almost exclusively committed by men, against (mostly)women and (sometimes)men; and yet our efforts to combat it start and practically end with focusing on what the woman should do to be safe.

Date: 2005-12-01 11:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miriamus.livejournal.com
I think people's attitudes have mostly gone beyond "she was asking for it" but this has got me thinking about when we talked about the whole idea of having to protect ourselves from rapists in Philosophy. Most of the group decided they didn't think it was fair that women's lives should be put out by having to make sure we didn't get raped...and you're right. The blame once it's happened isn't on the woman, but rapists are demonised so that potential victims are supposed to protect themselves, probably because we DO treat rapists as so inhuman that they can't control what they do. Or something.

Date: 2005-12-02 03:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] decado.livejournal.com
Yeah OK, fair enough. Perhaps being a guy I don't see it as much.

I'm surprised to see you of all people advocating personal freedom though! :P

Date: 2005-12-03 09:58 am (UTC)
ext_2569: text: "a straight account is difficult, so let me define seven wishes" image: man on steps. (Default)
From: [identity profile] labellementeuse.livejournal.com
Perhaps that's it.

Oh har har har, I am very much for liberty! And freedom! And stuff!

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