(no subject)

[labellementeuse]

There's this horrible woman who comes into work nearly every day to get a coffee, and every time she does she spends the whole time complaining about the shop, and she makes a mess of the area around the coffee machine, and she never so much as puts her empty sugar sachet in the bin. And this woman can fucking rant. Today I was a sucky, sucky customer service rep to her, and it was so good.

First some context. YESTERDAY, at a CALTEX STORE:
CRAZY HORRIBLE EVIL WOMAN (hence CHEW) enters and heads directly to the coffee machine. It whirrs and does not co-operate.
CHEW: Hey, the coffee machine isn't working.
YOURS TRULY (hence YT): Oh, sorry, let me have a look.
YT opens machine. It is a DISASTER.
YT: Hey, I'm sorry, it's had a brainfart and isn't working right now. I can clean it out and that might help but it'll be awhile, do you want to wait?
CHEW: Yes, I have to have my coffee. [Ranting.]
YT: Well, you can have [another brand of coffee that's ready-made.]
CHEW: No, they're too small. [Bitching.]
YT: OK, but it'll be a while.
YT dashes off, hurries through a clean, comes back to plug stuff in.
YT, fiddling with bits of plastic: OK, I'm just going to run it through a rinse cycle.
CHEW: But your fingers are in my food. [Moaning.]
YT, patiently: Yes, that's why I'm going to run it through a rinse cycle.
CHEW: Fine.
The coffee machine runs through a rinse cycle. CHEW bitches the whole time about how she comes here every day and every day she tells the manager to get the machine serviced and he ignores her and ON and ON and ON and I want to KILL HER but I do not because I am a good, good person.
YT: OK, we'll try it now.
CHEW uses the machine. It does not work.
CHEW, rudely: Hey it's still not working. [CONTINUED BITCHING] I have a RIGHT to COME IN HERE and HAVE EVERYTHING WORKING PERFECTLY and GET MY COFFEE. I have a RIGHT TO SERVICE.
[Aside: this is a direct quote only with less obscenity. For the record, she does not have a right to have everything perfect. Sometimes shit goes wrong and no-one can do anything about it. In fact, she does not even have a right to service. I have a right to refuse service to anyone I want so long as it's not discrimination on the basis of race, gender, orientation, etc. But since she's a white woman and so am I, I think I could get away with saying that she's a FUCKING BITCH and I don't serve them.]
YT, trying for patience: Well, I'm really sorry about that, but I can't do anything about it, perhaps you would like to try [other brand]?
CHEW has now been here trying everyone's patience for 20 minutes, I am just trying to get rid of her, she is horrible. HORRIBLE.
CHEW: Fine. But I don't trust the premade stuff and it's so small and and and and and and!!!!!
YT fiddles around with coffee machine trying to figure out what's wrong, eventually noting that only the cappucino and mochaccino aren't working. Latte is fine.
CHEW: OK I'll have a latte!
YT: Uh, but you've made the [branded coffee that is unable to be resold once heated up]... OK. Fine.
YT retreats to counter. CHEW makes double coffee, comes over with it.
CHEW: I can't find the large lids.
YT: I'm sorry, we don't have any right now.
CHEW: Well, that is UNACCEPTABLE, I HAVE to have a lid, why didn't you TELL ME you didn't have large lids, I drive a SPORTS CAR and I can't carry a coffee without a lid two minutes down the road to the shop where I work RANT RANT RANT I don't want it now, give me my money back.
YT: Fine. would you like your [premade coffee brand]?
CHEW: NO.
YT whimpers with relief and goes to empty the $6.50 worth of wastage the CHEW has created.

I was pretty patient with her. That was yesterday at about three pm. This morning at about 8:30 in she comes. THANK GOD, the machine works. of course she's still bitching but what can you do. She gets a double cup, fills it up and comes over.

CHEW: Where are the lids?
YT: Well, we don't have any...
CHEW: THAT'S UNACCEPTABLE, you should have told me the SECOND I walked in so I DIDN'T fill the cup, I DON'T WANT IT NOW BECAUSE OF MY SPORTS CAR, I TOLD you about the lids yesterday, why didn't you GET NEW ONES, you should have TOLD ME even though I HAVE EYES and I COULD HAVE SEEN that there were no lids, because I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO BE OBSERVANT OR USE MY BRAIN AND FIGURE OUT THAT BETWEEN LATE SUNDAY AND EARLY MONDAY THERE PROBABLY HAVE BEEN NO LID DELIVERIES.
YT, at end of patience, with great satisfaction: Yes, ma'am, but we can't actually magic them up out of thin air, so...

OF COURSE this was a huge mistake, she pitched a shit fit about me being rude (which, yes: I will cop to. I was rude. OTOH, I didn't swear, I wasn't being aggressive, and I said one thing after a lot of provocation. She said a lot of shit with no provocation. Not an excuse, just an explanation), yelled for the manager who kissed her ass all the way out the door and then came back and told me she was a bitch to him all the time.

Anyway. It ruined my whole day. Dear customers: early in the morning, you have a lot of power over your CSR's day. Be kind: be kind.

Comments

[maudlinrose.livejournal.com]

I feel your pain - and I think you did really well in not saying anything ruder.

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the support. :-/ I like to think I'm quite good at my crappy part-time job, so I actually don't like feeling like I'm sucky, but.

[maudlinrose.livejournal.com]

If it's any consolation: once I told an annoying 15yo boy that his problems were neither my responsibility nor my concern. And then his mother turned around and glared at me. And I'm sure you are good at your job - people sometimes just don't GET that the person who is serving them? Is a human being with thoughts and feelings and (probably) ambitions.

[aimeesworld.livejournal.com]

People are assholes sometimes. I think everyone should have to do a six month stint in customer service jobs so as to understand that things go wrong and stop being so freaking horrible.

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

Shit yes. god customers suuuuuuck.

[disturbed-kiwi.livejournal.com]

I had a guy come in to complain about our airhose yesterday. He kept going on about how he thought about taking his custom elsewhere ('That's Certainly Your Option Sir!') and how this was a service station "petrol, oil and food" ("You Didn't Mention Air Sir!") and how he amazed that I didn't seem to be taking much concern in his complaint ("They Don't Pay Me Enough To Care Sir!") and what was I going to do about it at 1.30 on a sunday? ("I Could Leave A Note For The Management If You Like Sir!")

("Things I actually said. To his face. Chirpily. !")

I could have told straight away that we knew the hose was busted and we were getting someone to come and fix it but they'd been putting us off. But I took more pleasure in it my way.



Also, I've had managers turn around to customers like yours and say Get out and don't come back, my staff and I don't need your business. I loved those managers.

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

I wish this woman would take her custom elsewhere. also, I wish I was as bitchy as you, I would feel a lot better. :P I mean, they just. What do they expect me to do, magic things better?

I also really, really wish my manager was that supportive. But they all suck.

[disturbed-kiwi.livejournal.com]

Being bitchy is dman fun. You've just got to find a very fine line where you cna claim being dumb and staying smiley rather than being straight out mean.

But yes, they do expect you to magic everything better. Anything else would be evidence that the worldmay in fact not be pointing towards them at all times and That's Just Not On.


Most managers do the fawning to the customer thing and I cna understand why. But it does make finding the good ones all the sweeter.

Get that degree and move on out of retail hun. And be glad you don't have to deal with shitty kids and parents who don't give a crap ;p

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

But yes, they do expect you to magic everything better. Anything else would be evidence that the worldmay in fact not be pointing towards them at all times and That's Just Not On.

OH MY GOD, SERIOUSLY. Ladies and gents, I am not being paid nearly enough to work miracles.

[cactus-cat.livejournal.com]

I am skeered of working retail. *cowers*

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

I was going to be like, it's not that bad. But it is. It is that bad. Don't dooo eeet, like, ever.

[cactus-cat.livejournal.com]

I won't unless someone holds a gun to my head. And even then I'll quit as soon as they stop.

Luckily my experience is all in the office-bitch career path, so I shouldn't have to... *touch wood*

[amarynth.livejournal.com]

God I hate it when managers kiss a customer's arse and then tell you you were right. And the unspoken subtext is that it doesn't matter, because the customer is always right. Damn whores.

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

yeah, me too. I was just standing there the whole time feeling like shit. :-/

[amarynth.livejournal.com]

Nobody with a Sports Car deserves any sympathy, ever, regardless of circumstances.

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

I don't think she's wealthy or anything! and, god, she kept talking about her SPORTS CAR, and I was like, WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT THAT, I don't think it makes a difference whether you have a sports car or a station wagon when it comes to hot beverages....

[ihatyou.livejournal.com]

Oh my goodness that is crazy and horrible and super rude. I can't imagine acting that way, I'd make myself cry or something. Although I also think that living life expecting and feeling entitled to have everything go perfectly your way must be a pretty stressful existence. Not that that makes it any less day-ruining to be on the receiving end.

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

Although I also think that living life expecting and feeling entitled to have everything go perfectly your way must be a pretty stressful existence.

This is HORRIBLE, but just the THOUGHT of that makes me feel so much better. schadenfreude: it's a wonderful thing.

[ihatyou.livejournal.com]

Heh. I know, it is somehow very calming.

[wenchpixie]

what a total cow. *hugs*

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

*hugsback* thanks hon!

[kitsunerei88]

Wow, she sounds OCD. ^^''

I never worked in customer service and don't really plan to, except as an option if I don't get research grants, and don't get university jobs like summer academic orientation counsellor (that would be fun! I could terrify all the first-years!!!) and tour guide (YES PREMADE EXCUSE TO SHOW OFF MY PRETTY, PRETTY SCHOOL). . .

Though I would love to work in a bookstore . . .

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

maybe, I guess? who knows.

HAHA I HATE YOU SO MUCH. *dies*

[flotternz.livejournal.com]

See that is why I no longer work in retail/customer service, because customers suck.

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

oh my god, beyond the telling.

[sixth-light.livejournal.com]

That reminds me of the time I got yelled at for ten minutes about bad signage, which was a) not my fault and b) not bad and ended up telling the lady that actually, we wrote the signs that way because we assumed people could read them.

...in my defence, the problem was entirely due to her failing to read the sign correctly and then being a prize bitch, but it didn't go down too well, so I apologised. For about a second there, though, I had the sweet taste of pwnage. It was good.

[labellementeuse.livejournal.com]

they're so STUPID and so ANNOYING and WHY WHY WHY. you know the real reason capitalism sucks? CUSTOMERS.

we were talking about surrogate pregnancies in ethics yesterday, and there was an argument against commercial surrogacy (paying people to have your babeeez) that ran along the lines that paying people to use their bodies in certain ways was degrading, and I can't remember the argument properly AT ALL right now, but a response to is was reduce that to its absurdity and it follows that buying things in a shop degrades the shopholder, and that was supposed to be patently ridiculous and the whole time I was thinking: HAHA YES TRUE. DUDE.