worryingly jolly batman

... because I don't feel like poetry today anyway.

"I WILl NOT APOLOGISE!"
-Nynaeve Al'Meara

"As you wish."
-Westley.

"You people talk about the living and the dead as if they were two mutually exclusive categories. As if you cannot have a river that is also a road, or a song that is also a color. "
-Mr. Ibis
American Gods

"Never send a human to do a machine's job."
     -Agent Smith
     The Matrix

It was on display in the bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying Beware of the Leopard.
     -Arthur Dent
     The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy

"This is my last body. My last life. This is my revenge body. My kill-Arthur-Dent body. My last chance. I had to fight to get it too."
     -Agrajag to Arthur
     Life, the Universe and Everything

Yet there may be a light beyond the darkness; and if so, I would have you see and be glad.
     -Aragorn
     Appendix A, The Lord Of The Rings

Am I busy? Well, I've just got all these bulldozers and things to lie in front of because they'll knock my house down if I don't, but other than that ... well, no not especially, why?
     -Arthur Dent
     The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy

You can't second-guess ineffability, I always say.
     -Aziraphale
     Good Omens

If the victorious army had to eat the fallen, war would become much less attractive.
     -Belgarath
     Belgarath the Sorcerer

What have I got in my pockets?
     -Bilbo Baggins, to Gollum
     The Hobbit

Less Lust through Less Protein, Eggs, Meat, Beans, Cheese, and Sitting.
     -Billboard Sign
     Neverwhere

*wails* too clever, too boring, to depressing, what is UP with me today???

*goes, very determinedly, to find Pterry*

"Let's just say that if complete and utter chaos was lightning, he'd be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armour and shouting 'All gods are bastards'."

-- Rincewind discussing Twoflower (Terry Pratchett, The Colour of Magic)

- "If you're going to suggest I try dropping twenty feet down a pitch dark
tower in the hope of hitting a couple of greasy little steps which might
not even still be there, you can forget it," said Rincewind sharply.
- "There is an alternative, then."
- "Out with it, man."
- "You could drop five hundred feet down a pitch black tower and hit stones
which certainly are there," said Twoflower.
Dead silence from below him. Then Rincewind said, accusingly, "That was sarcasm."

-- (Terry Pratchett, The Light Fantastic)

 "Pardon me for living, I'm sure."
- NO-ONE GETS PARDONED FOR LIVING.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Mort)

Poets have tried to describe Ankh-Morpork. They have failed. Perhaps it's the sheer zestful vitality of the place, or maybe it's just that a city with a million inhabitants and no sewers is rather robust for poets, who prefer daffodils and no wonder.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Mort)

Ankh-Morpork had dallied with many forms of government and had ended up with that form of democracy known as One Man, One Vote. The Patrician was the Man; he had the Vote.

-- Discworld politics explained (Terry Pratchett, Mort)

*sigh* okay, that's a little better.

Ooh, la la. NOW I'm feeling better.

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